I slow down to drive over speed bumps. Otherwise, the top of my head could hit the car ceiling, which is embarrassing, and slightly painful. I learned that lesson in my teens.

Have you heard of mental speed bumps?

Recently, I joined a virtual meeting on Zoom. I’d attended in the past, without incident. After joining from my laptop, I noticed a video delay in my words. I logged out. Oh-oh. Logging back in was not an option. A prompt asked for my password. It didn’t work and soon, I was officially locked out.

I called my local tech expert, and we agreed I’d bring my laptop in later. For now, I had another laptop to use. And another meeting coming up.

I set up laptop No. 2 prior to my next meeting. Then I noticed an email message from the host. A kindly message reminding me that she awaited my arrival. She must have mixed up the times, or so I thought. In fact, I was mixed up. The meeting had started ten minutes ago!

No worries – I’m getting to the part about mental speed bumps.

When I took my laptop to my tech expert, she found nothing wrong. It worked fine. What?

I drove home slowly, asking the Universe, “What’s my problem?” Two words sprang to mind: speed bumps. Huh? It took me a minute, but then I knew. My mind had been speeding with unworthy thoughts: “I’ve got so much to do!” “How will I get through it all?” “Do it faster!” “HURRY!”

Mentally, I’d reverted to my teenage self and raced everywhere, over everything, and practically ran over myself, causing my brain power to go haywire. Time to pause and reflect.

I slowed and edited my thoughts, asking, “Is this a constructive, positive thought?” Next, I implemented a calmness strategy: read something light and uplifting, bake blueberry muffins, walk in nature and take slow breaths. I worked at maintaining my tranquility and slowed my movements. I’m a work-in-progress, but I know the payoff is worthwhile. There is no going back because I’m keeping my mental speed bumps in place.

Every single day, there are rules I practice. If I don’t practice these rules, I deflate. Not totally, but enough to motivate me to stick to them. Here they are:

– I write daily. Even if it’s one paragraph. Because one paragraph can turn into one hundred words, or a thousand or more. Soon a story may be happily born. This daily practice nurtures a sense of accomplishment. Even a small dose of daily accomplishment does wonders for the soul.

– I make it a practice to donate any personal item that doesn’t elicit a sense of contentment in me, be it a tee-shirt, a book, a piece of furniture. Surrounding myself with things that make me happy is a must. Plus, it gives me the chance to pass on my former joy to someone else, which may give them joy, which in turn gives me newfound joy. What a wonderful possibility!

– A great sage once said, “There is no more liberating action than sincerely to give people kindness in return for unkindness.” ~ Paramahansa Yogananda.
I’ve tried this on many occasions. I don’t know how it made the other person(s) feel, but it gave me an instant lift. Isn’t there enough unkindness floating around in the world? We may never
realize the impact of our own good actions, but isn’t it worth taking the chance? Most importantly, it helps the doer let go of any negative emotions lingering from the unkind experience.

– Practice gratitude. Whether I’m outside of my house walking or in my room, writing or cooking or cleaning or anything at all, I often pause to note my blessings.
I was in Costco last week, waiting for a representative to check on an item for me. While waiting, I looked around and felt gratitude well up in my heart. Grateful for being there at that time, for having the opportunity to buy items I needed, for all the pleasant people around me and on and on and on. Before I knew it, my feet weren’t touching the ground.

These are just a few of the rules, but they play a monumental role in my inner peace and well being.

This year, especially toward the end, provided me with plenty of awe-inspiring moments and memories. When I’m awestruck, my heart is lifted up at least ten stories high. Sometimes, I’m lifted so high I feel like I can touch the clouds with my fingertips. Here’s a small sampling:

– In October, my mother and I were driving to one of my book events along a stretch of oceanside that we’ve passed many times, but that never looked the way it did that cloudy morning. As streaks of sunlight shown through, soft, glistening waves were threaded in silver and gold. I didn’t take a photo (my hands were on the steering wheel, thankfully) and Mom was busy drinking in the majestic scenery. This lovely photo comes close:
But in our stretch of sparkling sea, jagged gray rocks matching the silvery waves had replaced the sand. Breathtaking. I still feel ripples of awe when I revisit the picture in my mind’s eye.

– I am perpetually in awe of the affectionate and playful love between my canines, and the pure love they show to us humans as well. That love is so palpable that I feel it pouring through me by just being in their company.
Chico is nine-years young and Willow is four. Willow is nimble-pawed and races with the ease and stamina of a Kentucky Derby thoroughbred. Chico lumbers around at tortoise speed. Occasionally, he’ll pick up his paws and cantor about twenty feet before reverting to his relaxed ambling. Yet, patient Willow will not eat her food until Chico arrives, so they can chow down together.

– I don’t take book writing for granted. Ever. It’s a miracle every time. When I take a breath and remind myself that seven of my books have been published, I’m in awe. How did that happen? I’m so grateful that there’s always some help from above. Otherwise, I’d still be writing and rewriting my first book, ten years later.

So many wonderful awe moments fill our lives. May we never be without them.