Have you ever been rejected or hurt or offended or experienced a negative emotion that’s a challenge to shake off? For writers, being of a sensitive nature, this can be problematic. But writers are also risk takers. Every time they write a story sharing their personal visions and imagination and then set it loose in the world, they are demonstrating courage, which is needed to exercise resilience.

But there are times when we feel overwhelmed by negation. How to bounce back quickly and move on?

1. Never allow discouragement in. It stifles our desire to make that greater effort, and it limits our potential. Replace discouragement with courage and lots of faith. Ever hear of bestselling author Debbie Macomber? She wasn’t an overnight sensation, but she is a great and talented success.

2. Face your rejection. Okay, so someone wasn’t keen on your manuscript. If criticism was offered, learn from it and move on. It just takes a little practice to learn to move on. Keep writing. Every time you do, it brings you closer to your goal of publication.

3. Don’t be attached to the outcome. Very Zen-like, don’t you think? I have a manuscript or two that has yet to be published. What if they’re never published? When I ask myself if I enjoyed writing them, the answer is a resounding yes! Which means, that whether they’re published or not, they were worthwhile to me. Keep your perspective and you’ll be exercising resilience.

4. Practice Optimism. This is where social support can be helpful. Reach out to other writers who understand the importance of bouncing back. Or to anyone who’s faced a challenge and overcome it. Fan your good attitude so that you keep your fire of passion for your craft thriving.

5. Nurture your sense of humor.

This is not a headless dog. This is Willow in her favorite position. Did the picture make you smile?
Laughter is not only the best medicine, it’s a game changer. If you can laugh at a negative situation, it diffuses the unpleasant impact, allowing you to let go more quickly and do what we need to do. Move on!

Putting New Year’s resolutions aside, I’d like to reflect on past year (and previous years’) successes; to appreciate accomplishments. We’ve got this powerful gift of memory to help us recall the good stuff, what we’ve learned, and how we’ve changed through what we’ve learned.

Here goes:

– I’ve written six novels plus a picture book, and a few short stories. One big success was having a romance short story published in Woman’s World magazine. What a gift! I truly thought that would never happen. Same with the published novels and books. Miracles!

– I’ve learned that there is no more liberating action than to give someone kindness in return for unkindness. Not an easy or initially appealing feat, but after doing it once, I realized what a great benefit it was, not just for me, but hopefully, the other person, too. It gave me a sense of gentle empowerment over an unpleasant situation.

– So many lovely people I’ve encountered in recent times! SOOO many, both virtually, and in person. I’ve learned from them and had opportunities to work alongside many of them. Even people I run into at the grocery store, library, big box stores…you name it…have been absolutely wonderful. There are plenty of nice people out there.

– I have read an exceptional number of great books this past year, many of them novels and inspirational readings, that serve as reminders of what is important in life. What to hold close to my heart.

– I make a point to recall anything that kindles my enthusiasm, gratitude, motivation, and best behavior. Don’t we want to be the best version of ourselves, whenever possible?

– Regarding mistakes: Learn the lessons and move on. This helps us look ahead with confidence. If we do our part, we won’t repeat mistakes.

– On pending situations: Be patient without feeling discouraged. Easier said than done, but being hopeful is a big help. No, I am not singing, “The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Music” in this photo, although it looks like I am. I’m just happy that the stream didn’t overflow and wreak havoc. :)

Yes, that’s right. Whether I have a headache or a writing challenge or any stumbling block, I tend towards this helpful ritual: practicing gratitude.

Gratitude leads to stepping stones that help me switch direction; putting me where I should be. Where I want to be: in a wondrous, thankful state of mind.

But it’s not a quick, “I’m thankful for…” Gratitude must be felt in the heart. It’s an essential quality for fostering positive feelings and thoughts, providing an automatic lift when most needed. The deeper it’s felt, the longer that gratitude-high lasts.

We humans tend to take a lot for granted. At least I do. But taking time each day to appreciate the countless gifts in my life changes my state of mind. Keeping a gratitude journal is helpful, but even thinking and concentrating on blessings works. Here’s a sampling of what I either write down or deeply contemplate in appreciation:

– the love of family and friends (including canine and feathered pals).
– warmth, comfort, sweet scents, and birdsong.
– blue skies, nature’s beauty, possibilities.
– all the many material conveniences.
– I’m a published author!
– writing, gardening, walking, driving, even cleaning! So many luxuries at my disposal (washing machine, vacuum).
– the valuable lessons in every experience.

This simple practice isn’t a Pollyanna approach, but it is an approach that helps keep proper perspective. It promotes understanding of our own situations and that of others. Wouldn’t you agree that most of our problems either stem from or are made worse by a poor attitude? I know mine are. And practicing daily leads to a regular habit of carrying a grateful heart. The more I practice, the less room there is for negative aspects to sneak in. I’m betting there are many of you out there who are already practicing, and that thought fills my heart with gratitude!